I don't know about you but I'm beginning to get quite used to the occasional three day weekend. One each month would be rather lovely and I've actually convinced myself that this is all it would take for me to become more organised, get on top of everything and have a little time left over simply for fun.
Just recently, I've found myself becoming overwhelmed once again. I feel like I'm being pulled in several different directions at once and I'm finding it difficult to focus, achieve anything remotely productive and then struggling to switch off, my sleep patterns being reflective of this. This is resulting in me feeling lethargic and sluggish, which is never good. I know that I always feel better for some fresh air and exercise, so last weekend I had made sure the house was clean, the supermarket shop had been done, I baked some sticky lemon cake and flapjack, then having spent the whole of the last week studying, the books and laptop were placed out of sight and we ventured outdoors.
I hadn't realised just how much I was in need of the break. We followed the sun to the coast and it felt wonderful to breathe in the sea air and leave any unnecessary stresses behind. We walked along the shoreline to where the pebbles meet the sand and enjoyed a picnic, sheltered from the cool, sea breeze. We had fun running up and down the sand dunes and simply relaxed, watching as the tide came in.
Having set off early in the day, there was plenty of time for a trip to the park and a walk up a hill, past the café with it's beautiful display of wisteria, to the monument at the top. With it being such a bright, sunny day we chose to climb up to the viewing platform, which is accessed via a very steep, narrow, spiral staircase of 112 steps. I felt fine going up, but coming back down my legs felt wobbly. I discovered muscles I never knew I had and they've been aching ever since!
At least, on returning home, I could enjoy a lovely slice of homemade lemon cake with my mug of tea. I felt so much better for some fresh air and exercise. The overwhelming sensation of physical exhaustion was most welcome and strangely refreshing from having felt mentally fatigued. I now realise the importance of factoring in more time like this, so if anyone has any ideas on finding the elusive balance between work and play, or tips on becoming more organised generally, then I would genuinely love to hear them. X
Ah - the secret of life, the universe and everything! I guess 42 doesn't really help! (sorry)
ReplyDeleteWhen I feel the stress rising, I make lists and they do help but not everyone finds that works.
Also I look for solo time - time on my own, away from everyone. I block it out in my diary.
xx
I do like a list, I think it's the solo time I struggle most with. X
DeleteIt seems that being overwhelmed by stress is a pandemic. We take on more and more not realizing what it is doing to our well being. Even in our leisure time we try to pack in so much into it that we have no real down time. Finding ‘me time’ is almost impossible but I have found that as little 20 minutes of meditation brings me to a calming place and gives me mental break that I need so badly at times. We all cope in different ways, I hope you find one that works for you.
ReplyDeleteI think that's the problem. I'm trying to do so much at once, that I'm not giving my best to any one thing. X
DeleteSometimes you just have to be able to switch off get out doors and blow the cobwebs away don't you and you always feel so much better afterwards. It looks like you had a fabulous time at the coast. I've not been to the coast for a while so I think when the sun does decide to put its hat on we may just have to venture out for the day somewhere. The lemon cake looks lovely and I bet it went down very well with a nice cup of tea after all that exercise.
ReplyDeleteMitzi
Getting outdoors definitely helps me, although there is always that little bit of guilt that I should be using the time to get on with something else. The cake was delicious, thank you. It's just a shame it's gone already. X
DeleteYour weekend sounds lovely. I try to go for a walk round my local area most days, sometimes only a mile, sometimes as much as 4miles. I find that getting outside even for a short time helps towards breaking that cycle of anxiety & lethargy. Unf today's trip will be to the vet, and that'll be stressful!!
ReplyDeleteI always feel better for getting out for a walk but then I have the guilt of not making 'better' use of my time. I hope the vets visit goes OK. X
DeleteThere is nothing like the sound of the sea to make you feel better. You certainly took us on a lovely stroll. The wisteria was a delight.
ReplyDeleteOh yes, the sound of the sea. I find it very soothing. X
DeleteNo tips here I'm afraid Jules, I've been struggling with time management myself lately. I started writing a blog post yesterday talking about this very subject, and what a surprise, have yet to finish and publish it, but it's next on my To Do list.
ReplyDeleteI love the look of your cake. you are inspiring me. Something else I've not done for a while is bake anything. I wish you could send me a slice of your cake!!
Glorious photos. that Wisteria is beautiful. And the sea looks like the med, just stunning. I'm with you there. Whenever I want to clear my mind, I head to the sea. Sunshine or rain, it doesn't matter, it always works a treat.
Lots of love to you xxxx
I know I need to take a long, hard look at everything I've got going on and probably make some bold decisions. If I continue as I am, something will give and I'm not prepared to let it get to that.
DeleteIt was an unexpected delight to see the wisteria. It looked so beautiful in the sunshine. X
Blue sky, blue sea and sunshine, no wonder you felt better after that, sometimes that's all it takes. I think finding a balance in life is hard, especially when you've got a little one as your time is rarely your own, it's just a case of doing your best with the time you have. That lemon cake looks delicious.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jo. It's the balance I need to work on. Trying to run a home is a full time job in itself and, what with everything else I have going on, something will need to give. X
DeleteOh Jules I am so sorry that you are feeling overwhelmed again. I well remember it from when I used to work outside the home and had to try and fit everything in that was important leaving little time for fun things. Now and again I'd have a 'blow the housework' day and take the kids to the park with a picnic. Housework is always there....precious time with children soon slips through your fingers plus I think it's good to rebel....lol.
ReplyDeleteHugs-x-
I do try to make sure I make time for the fun things but then I feel guilty. I think I will need to make some changes. X
DeleteYour photos of the beach are wonderful. I'm glad you got away and enjoyed yourself. I find that if I do challenging exercise each day, it helps. I also have my meals and coffee out in nature. List making helps to set priorities.
ReplyDeleteBeing outdoors and connecting with nature always makes me feel much better. X
DeleteSometimes you just have to force yourself to go out and get some fresh air and exercise- you usually end up feeling better for it. I empathise though- life is busy and it's not always easy to achieve balance xx
ReplyDeleteI'm realising more and more just how difficult it is to achieve that balance. I need to take a long hard think as to how best to move forwards. X
DeleteWrite a list of things you have done. Never write a list of whats to do.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jill. That's a good idea, although it will be a short list :)
DeleteWhat a beautiful place you live in!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jenny. I feel very fortunate to live where I do. X
Delete"I've found myself becoming overwhelmed once again. I feel like I'm being pulled in several different directions at once and I'm finding it difficult to focus, achieve anything remotely productive and then struggling to switch off, my sleep patterns being reflective of this."
ReplyDeleteOverwhelmed.... Pulled in several different directions at once... Trouble with sleeping....
This, sounds as if you are trying to do too many things.
Some things are built in. :-) Wife, mother, homemaker are.
But what's with the books and studying?
Why are you adding this, to your regular life activities/duties?
Is it your choice? Or are you doing this, because "they say" you *should* be so doing?
Perhaps you do not need to _organize_ your life. Perhaps you have too many things, in your life. Which you are trying to find time to do... Too many 'balls in the air,' which you are trying to balance.
Have you considered taking the quiet time? Please don't say "_when_?"... -smile- Make the time.
To sit with yourself. Ask yourself, what life style, would make you the happiest?
Would concentrating your energies on the roles of wife, mother, homemaker, person with some free time, make you the happiest?
Is the continuing education, adding too much into your life mix?
Is it really a necessity?
You asked. I do not pretend to have all the answers. I just made a couple of possible suggestions.
Gentle hugs...
I did ask, WoW and I really appreciate your suggestions. I am definitely doing too much and need to make some tough decisions how best to move forward, before I make myself ill and, therefore, would be of no use to anyone.
DeleteMy studying (although not completely necessary right now, would prove very beneficial in the future) does seem to be my main issue. If I can focus on this and get it out of the way, I know it would make a huge difference. I just need a few extra hours in each day in order to get on top of this. X
I love seeing your days out, little "micro-adventures", something we are definitely not doing enough of at present. Just a few hours out can be so very restorative :-)
ReplyDeleteIt is wonderful how you are constantly creating such fabulous outdoor memories for Lily.
I often think of our days out as mini-adventures. Lily will definitely have many outdoor memories to look back on. X
DeleteI have just come from Sadie's blog with the same question. I was just saying that my gran never had time management problems - it comes with today's lifestyle pressures and pace. Women are trying to fit into a weekend what they once did throughout a whole week. Five into two just don't go no matter how you try.
ReplyDeleteGetting away and into the countryside does help to clear your mind and is very refreshing.
A friend of ours has just had a major stroke at 55 - although he was physically active before he is completely disabled now and at risk of vascular dementia setting in. He cannot even concentrate to watch TV. So cruel. It has made me stop and think big time - our health and wellbeing should be our number 1 priority above a nice home or anything else. Without our health, physical or mental we have nothing.
Hope you find a way through x
You are so right Vivien and I am mindful of the pressures of modern life. Trying to please everyone and fit everything in does not come easy, and all too often something has to give.
DeleteThrough similar circumstances, I have become very aware I need to prioritise my health, which I know is suffering at the moment, but I promise I will find a way through and make any necessary changes. X
Ah, yes, that struggle to find balance! Don't I know it well! I am still struggling, even after all these years! Often, it is because we have too much going on in our lives. At some point, we need to start saying, "No" to some of it, or, at least, cut back. I'm glad you were able to manage a trip to the sea and enjoy some time out walking. That lemon cake looks delicious! And I love the look of that wisteria covered building! Hope the summer brings you more balanced days into your life.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Bless. Yes, I am going to have to be much firmer with myself. I should really take the time to do a balanced life wheel, like you suggested. Maybe seeing it written down will give me the push I need to make some changes. X
DeleteOh dear Jules, motherhood and getting jobs done with children in the mix too, it's no wonder you feel stressed. Your cake looks lovely and your walk probably blew some cobwebs by the sound of it.
ReplyDeleteSome thoughts and how I used to study with the OU.
Cleaning ****** I've found the organised mum helped me - with 15 mins daily for basic jobs plus 30 mins only on Mon - Fri in a room and housework free weekends. That's the cleaning sorted.
Jobs & errands ****** Write 3 - 5 things down that MUST be done that day. Anything else later will have to do.
Studying ****** set a timer for 30 mins approx to study. Then go do a task for 15 mins such as laundry, very quick hoover.
Then back for another 30 mins study.
Repeat for how long you need to study for eg 2 hrs a day - broken down into
4 x 30mins.
All the best Cx
I like how you've broken it all down like that. I'll give it a try. Thank you, Cathy. X
DeleteHope it helps, Jules. I just found I couldn't study for long stretches at a time. Procrastination is a very strange thing, because you start noticing jobs that need doing eg ironing.
DeleteThis way I could take a break, make a cuppa, put washing out or whatever but then get back to studying after 15 mins. All the best whatever you do x
The ironing is done (for today at least) and I'm going to see if I can put your plan into action, although with Lily at home it's going to be easier said than done. I just need to be realistic as to what I will be able to achieve. X
DeleteMaybe you could do all the "have-to's" on one day of the weekend and leave the other day for getting outside and relaxing. When I was working I always thought I would have gladly worked longer days 4 days a week to have a 3 day weekend every week. Your photos of the sea are just wonderful!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sue. That's a great idea, although not quite as good as my idea of a regular three day weekend ;)
DeleteLife is so hectic, despite all our modern conveniences. I think the internet is a lot to blame in not being able to 'switch off'. We're getting information overload. Trying to plan ahead and then sticking to those plans could help. Keeping a to-do list might help too in freeing up time for relaxation. Best, Jane x
ReplyDeleteYou are so right, Jane. I do try and keep my internet use down as much as possible, as I know how it affects my ability to switch off. Maybe I need to be more strict with this. X
DeleteOH- I know how good that feels to step outside of the 'everyday ordinary' and regenerate the inner self. Good for you for taking the time to do it. I need to do that more often,too. What a beautiful spot you found to escape to and enjoy. Hugs- Diana
ReplyDeleteThank you, Diana. I think we should all try and escape more often. X
DeleteThe sea is magical when it comes to resetting feelings of overwhelm, the sounds, the space, that incredible blue!
ReplyDeleteI very much agree with your suggestion of a three day weekend, I think it would help everyone to be more productive because we'd all be refreshed from extra time to relax, spend time with our loved ones and eat cake. I'm working to improve my sleep at the moment which I think would be the single biggest thing to improve my life.
Maybe we should start a petition for a regular three day weekend ;)
DeleteI'm sure a decent night's sleep would also make a huge difference to my energy levels. I was thrilled to be awake at 5.30a.m. this morning, rather than my regular 4a.m. I'm going to take some of your suggestions on board. X
"I always feel better for getting out for a walk but then I have the guilt of not making 'better' use of my time."
ReplyDeleteHaving read your post and admired the wisteria and enjoyed the walk with you I wouldn't dream of trying to offer a solution simply because even at my advanced age I do not have a solution nor do I anywhere near enough time to do everything. I never will have and you, probably, never will have. The difference between you and me is that I learned many years ago not to feel guilty about it. That means that some things in my life have never been achieved when they should have been achieved. Even today I looked at my 'to do' list and sighed. However, if it doesn't get done naebodies deid (as 'they' say in Scotland).
If you want to go for a walk, go for a walk. You'll be more productive when you get back. Just don't feel guilty when you're walking. And there I was saying I wouldn't offer advice. Unfortunately I'm a man - giving advice is genetically printed in me.
I like your saying 'naebodies deid' and it is so very true. I consider myself fortunate that my worries are, at least, all 'first world problems' and probably stem from my need to not disappoint or let anyone down (especially myself). I will try and retain a sense of perspective, and I will go for that walk. X
DeleteWe all know that fresh air and exercise work wonders but at times our lives are so full of other stuff that we forget how much we need it. Recharging the batteries is essential and sometimes we have to put that first. I agree with Jane (above) - a to do list helps me prioritise.
ReplyDeleteI managed to achieve more than I originally anticipated over the weekend, although I now have a huge list to get through once I finish work today. I do like a list. X
DeleteYour walk looks stunning and hopefully you have enjoyed calmer days since.
ReplyDeleteI've just returned from a week at the seaside, a caravan free of internet and just a good book and some knitting to keep my company when mother nature sent some rain which kept me inside. I've returned feeling brighter, calmer and happier. you are quite right, fresh air and a good walk does wonders!
Have a lovely week
Thank you, Julie. Your week away sounds blissful. I'm sure stepping away from the internet from time to time has many benefits, with the exception of blogging, of course. 😆
DeleteI've been trying to get the balance right for years and it still eludes me. However, you have jogged my memory: there was a time when my children were still quite young when I was working 4 days and one or two nights a week and I studied for a degree. I spent one full day a week in college and two evenings (2 hours each) and Saturdays (6 hours)on independent study. I could only do it because it was for a limited period (two years), my husband was supportive and I was highly motivated and very well-organised. I look back at that time now and am amazed that I managed it, but it took its toll on my mental health. It's only in recent years that I have realised that I need to be creative in some way every day in order to hold my balance. x
ReplyDeleteIt all sounds very familiar. You did remarkably well to juggle all of that and I hope you are very proud of yourself for what you've achieved. My creativity has also been lacking recently and I suspect that would go a long way to making me feel more balanced. X
DeleteJules, I love this post and I can totally relate. I've been feeling the same way lately - overwhelmed and all over the place with very little time for myself. I know I need to incorporate more exercise into my daily routine - it makes such a difference. Just seeing your bright, beach photos made me feel a bit more refreshed. May is a very busy month for us, as it's the last month of school for my daughter before summer break, so lots of end of the school year functions and activities. I'm looking forward to a break from the school routine, and heading to coast for several days for some rest and relaxation at the beginning of June. Take care, my friend.
ReplyDeleteI know I would feel much better for getting some daily exercise, but again, time is the issue. I really hope that I can manage to power on through the next couple of months and regain some equilibrium (and my waistline!).
DeleteYour trip to the coast sounds like the perfect way to relax and is something to look forward to. X
I do think that it is often difficult to get the life balance right, and more so these days than in years gone by. I think you did the right thing to get out and enjoy the beautiful weather, countryside and sea. Your photographs are gorgeous.
ReplyDeleteYou also did the right thing when you got home ... sitting down with a slice of homemade lemon cake and a mug of tea.
Take care
All the best Jan
It's never easy is it, and I think our day to day lives are getting busier than ever with many, mainly unnecessary, pressures. It makes such a difference to be able to get outdoors and switch off, if even just for a short wile. X
DeleteHello, I think this is my first visit to your blog. Just want to say how much I enjoyed this post. A visit to the sea is certainly a good way to slow down and recalibrate one's thoughts and priorities! There is certainly a lot of beauty where you live. I will be visiting again to enjoy the loveliness.
ReplyDeleteIt's lovely to see you here. A very warm welcome to you.
DeleteI find time by the sea usually helps me put things in perspective. That's probably why I find myself drawn to it regularly. X
I don't know how I missed this - well I do know, my computer went kaput and I'm using a borrowed laptop just now so don't get email notifications of posts :( The beach photos are lovely, especially the first one - I always think that to be on an empty beach with nothing but sea and sand is so peaceful and relaxing :)
ReplyDeleteI hope you manage to get your computer fixed or replaced soon, I know I'd be lost without mine. The beach is lovely here. It's usually fairly quiet, and with a good stretch of shoreline to walk along there is always a quiet spot to enjoy. X
DeleteWhat a wonderful beach and that home made lemon cake looks so delicious! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Nikki-ann. We often enjoy a walk along this beach, and on particularly windy days, we can shelter among the dunes for a picnic. X
DeleteStudying...oh how I remember those days...not so long ago actually...how about half an hour study followed by some get up and move time. I'm much the same with our business paperwork. Huge chunks of time and my brain goes foggy and the willpower goes completely. x
ReplyDeleteThat's a good idea, Jackie. I just have to be careful the get up and move time doesn't involve me heading out of the door. 😃
Delete