A Different Kind of Summer

I've discovered a lot about myself over the last eight months. I have also come to realise just how strong I am, when I need to be. I am continuing along a winding path, still unsure where it will lead. I have ups and downs. Days of optimism and exuberance, quickly swallowed up by moments of uncertainty and doubt. Physically, I feel as if I might finally be gaining some strength, as recently, I haven't experienced any of those sudden crashes in my energy levels, which knocked me for six on many occasions. 

Summer has looked a little different this year. Usually, I'd have a holiday booked, days out, and be planning things in the background. Instead, I've had to learn to take things slowly. A different approach, especially seeing as I've lost a lot of my confidence, lately. 

But, the weather! The weather here has been absolutely beautiful. We've been enjoying some gentle evening walks, kayaking at the lake, and compared with last year, we've eaten so many more of our meals outdoors. It's been wonderful. 

There have been shady woodland wanderings, when the weather has been far too hot to stay in the sun.

Both cats are to be found lazing around in the garden. Boo occasionally disappears off into the long grass of the field, returning home covered in cleavers! I'm forever pulling them off his fur. While Mog stirs only to chase the butterflies, of which there have been so many this summer. 

Along the lanes, the air is filled with the heady scent of meadowsweet, buddleia, and honeysuckle. I'm barefoot most days, and it all reminds me so very much of how summers felt when I was young. 

Work ended on a high for me. I'd previously mentioned how my role had changed quite drastically since the start of the year, and I had more than a touch of imposter syndrome. Anyway, I had tried so hard to do the job to the best of my ability - only to find that my colleagues had all been absolutely delighted with my work. I was gifted so many cards and flowers. It was the nicest feeling to know that I must have been doing something right all along, and I can't tell you what a relief it also was. 

I am off now until September, for some much needed rest time. Although, I have no doubt that it will go by quickly. Elderberries and blackberries are already beginning to ripen, the maize field has grown taller than I am, and the days are becoming noticeably shorter. The surrounding fields have turned to straw, as the summer sun has taken it's toll. The colours may change throughout the seasons, but the undulating outline of the fells remains reassuringly familiar and certain.

I really hope the days are being kind to you, and that you are having a lovely summer, wherever you are.

Back soon.

J. X